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Posts Tagged ‘defence’

‘I thought Polonius was an intruder’ Hamlet tells prosecution

The Prince of Denmark has told his murder trial that his future father-in-law, Polonius did not scream or shout as he took his sword and stabbed him through the arras.

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Posted: Apr 17th, 2014
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Cuts in UK Circus College ‘limit Britain’s clown capabilities’

‘I understand that the UK is down to two clown cars, barely enough to transport a mere 30 clowns. Some of their shoes have been reduced to size 20 and buckets of gunk are having to be rationed.’

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Posted: Jan 17th, 2014
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Justice ‘Overrated’, claims Justice Secretary

decision made after consultations with expensive lawyersThe Police are to be given a role in deciding whether or not a defendant receives legal aid support, under new proposals from Chris Grayling.

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Posted: Jun 6th, 2013
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UK poor people must do more to help kill foreign poor people, says Defence Secretary

Defence Secretary Philip Hammond says that poor people in Britain should do more to help to kill poor people in other countries by taking a cut in their welfare benefits to allow much-needed funds for the armed forces.

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Posted: Mar 4th, 2013
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Petraeus scandal forces UK defence chiefs ‘to pull out’

In the light of recent revelations concerning General David Petraeus, senior members of UK armed forces have admitted that they are frequently having to make a ‘hasty tactical withdrawal’ after their privates have been sent into action without proper protection.

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Posted: Nov 22nd, 2012
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