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Posts Tagged ‘devil’

Devil agrees to trial community sentences

just dong an honest day's workThe Devil will impose non-custodial sentences following a report by the Chief Inspector of Prisons highlighting problems of overcrowding and poor conditions in Hell.

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Posted: Oct 13th, 2010
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Estate agent who sold his soul disappointed with current market value

What a shame‘I should have read the small print,’ confessed Darren Johnson, 32, ‘but Satan was so charming and persuasive, and he told me I couldn’t possibly lose.’

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Posted: Jul 23rd, 2009
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Satan releases DNA results to prove no link with Mandelson

A triumphant Satan held a press conference yesterday, after a DNA test proved he has no genetic link to Peter Mandelson.

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Posted: May 2nd, 2009
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Mainstream school told to accept demon-possessed child

987-posessed-childA comprehensive in Reading has today been ordered to admit a local demon possessed child even though the headmaster had complained they could not cater for the specific needs of satanic pupils or get the bed she was tied to through its doors.

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Posted: Feb 22nd, 2009
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