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Posts Tagged ‘Easter Bunny’

Tooth fairy moving onto kidneys

pound left under dialysis machineWith half of the UK’s eight-year-olds suffering from tooth decay, all gossamer-winged withdrawals will now focus on harvesting undamaged organs. Children can now expect to wake with significant surgical scarring in the abdominal area, problems filtering urine and a pound coin under their pillow ‘for their troubles’.

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Posted: Mar 19th, 2015
More from Health

Father Christmas bemoans zero hours contract

exclusivity deal means he can't work anywhere elsePopular present delivery service Father Christmas has called on the Government to do more to prevent the use of controversial zero hours contracts. ‘Don’t get me wrong,’ he explained, ‘it’s better than being unemployed, but I just have to wait around all year waiting for the call to say they’ve got some work for me. Did you know, I’ve only done 500 days work in the last 500 years? If it wasn’t for all the mince pies I can grab on Christmas Eve I don’t think I’d survive the year.’

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Posted: Dec 6th, 2014
More from World News

Santa to challenge decision to award present franchise to Easter Bunny

promising to run away from franchise at first sign of troubleBearded franchise-holder Father Christmas today strongly criticised the Government’s decision to award the West Coast Christmas Eve present-delivery franchise to his rival, the Easter Bunny.

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Posted: Dec 9th, 2012
More from Business