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Posts Tagged ‘Easter’

Jesus loses in ‘Masterchef – The Deities’ final following disappointing ‘loaves and fishes’ dish

Fans of the BBC’s popular ‘Masterchef – The Deities’ series were left reeling last night as odds-on favourite Jesus Christ fell at the last hurdle, handing victory on a plate to rank outsider Buddha.

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Posted: Apr 7th, 2012
More from Celebrity, Faith



NHS proudly unveils new type 3 diabetes

eager upgraders now queueing round the blockThe National Health Service today unveiled the long-expected new type 3 diabetes to a packed press conference in Hammersmith, claiming it is the ‘best ever’ version of the disease. Simply referred to as ‘The New Diabetes’, this updated condition has already taken the US by storm, with obese people literally jumping with joy (albeit not very high) at the new features of this ailment.

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Posted: Apr 5th, 2012
More from Health



Mother delights grown-up children with stories of food bargains

Proving the saying ‘a penny saved is a story to be told’, Redhill resident Mary Kennedy has been delighting her grown-up children with stories of special offers and food bargains every time they have visited her in the last six years.

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Posted: Mar 10th, 2012
More from Features



Christian festival to be moved to avoid clash with Christmas

Satanic market forces at work‘In hindsight choosing 25th December was a mistake. We thought it would be a great time to have the festival – practically everyone’s off work for Christmas and the schools are closed. But in reality people are far too busy eating too much, getting pissed, trying to cop off at office parties and watching the My Family Christmas special.’

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Posted: Dec 8th, 2011
More from Faith



Jesus suspended for wearing cross at work

Health and safety decided it could cause a bit of painful chafingJesus of Nazareth was suspended today after wearing a cross to work. Simon, also known as Peter, or Rocky to his mates, sales manager of a small collective of preachers and miracle workers, said their founder and chief executive Jesus had been behaving increasingly irrationally recently and yesterday had abandoned the group during a breakout session in the Garden of Gethsemane.

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Posted: Apr 21st, 2011
More from World News