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In a surprise move, sofa retailer DFS announced today they are all set to buck the national trend of economic doom and gloom. The peddler of softwood, foam and velour seating confirmed that plans are well advanced to launch a massive cut price sale. Photographs of disconcertingly small lounging adults and children have been taken and advertising space has already been booked to carry uplifting messages of substantial savings across the range of comfortable armchairs, and two and three seaters, some in leather.

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Posted: Dec 27th, 2011
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Renowned homeopathic economist Doctor Stephen Harliton has criticised recent attempts to solve the international financial crisis. “Conventional treatments don’t work, asking people to spend less is too rational.”

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Posted: Oct 14th, 2011
More from News In Brief

Several gifts have been rescheduled, to reflect changes in value since the list was first drafted. 50th Wedding anniversaries are now celebrated with a two-foot length of copper pipe, but the new 60th ‘Full Tank of Diesel’ anniversary has been criticised as ‘extravagant’ by some economists.

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Posted: Oct 12th, 2011
More from News In Brief

In an announcement that will delight shoppers and the city alike, a fourteen-figure sum of Nectar points will be released into the economy to boost consumer spending. Eight billion air miles will also be created, enough for a family of four to travel to RAF Northolt and back (terms and conditions apply), while Boots Advantage Card owners will get a free nail care kit.

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Posted: Oct 9th, 2011
More from Business

Republican House Speaker, John Boehner, said that the President’s dinner plans amounted to ‘nothing more than a reheating of last night’s leftovers’.

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Posted: Sep 23rd, 2011
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