A 13-year-old Lancashire schoolboy has become the first pupil in the UK to successfully light a Bunsen burner without turning it up too high or too low or attempting to burn his school to the ground.
Posted: Mar 6th, 2014
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Education Secretary Michael Gove has announced changes to the history GCSE syllabus that will reflect ‘a more accurate and balanced’ view of World War One as a bit of jolly fun instead of a four-year cataclysmic bloodbath that drained the nation’s power and prestige and caused untold mental and physical suffering to millions.
The traditional view of the so-called ‘Great War’ as four years of futile barbaric slaughter is wrong, says Gove. ‘Historicans and commentators have long been calling for a “debunking” of wartime myths,’ he insisted. ‘At least, the ones I’ve been paying to advise me have. And that’s enough.’
Posted: Feb 13th, 2014
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‘He’s just dim,’ said Dr Janice Trenter. ‘Someone has to be.’
Posted: Feb 5th, 2014
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Waterstones have today announced that pre-orders of the widely anticipated manual, ‘Teaching: Everything I know’, penned by education minister Michael Gove, have been ‘spiralling into negative figures’.
Posted: Jan 21st, 2014
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Michael Gove has today announced that students at state schools who receive over £10 a week in pocket money will be ‘stopped at the school gates by monitors’, nicknamed ‘Gove’s Angels’, and forced to voluntarily donate the cash to school funds. Although no physical force will be used, students who resist may see their grades go down and their cries of help ignored.
Posted: Jan 20th, 2014
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