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Posts Tagged ‘Environment’

Water bosses praised for ‘far-sighted’ summer hosepipe ban

Thank goodness we didn't overwater the lawn this yearWater companies in England are today being widely praised for their ‘uncanny and far-sighted’ imposition of a hosepipe ban during the summer.

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Posted: Nov 22nd, 2012
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Millions of badger refugees flood across Welsh border

badgers Sarge, fousands of 'emSections of the M5 and the Severn Bridge were shut last night as thousands of badger refugees fled in convoy from villages in Gloucestershire and Somerset over the border to Wales.

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Posted: Oct 14th, 2012
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Wind Farm goes into administration after lack of breeding

‘I’ll admit, I didn’t look into it as much as I should, but thought wind farming and salmon farming couldn’t be that different’ the redundant farmer, John Bilco told us.

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Posted: Sep 30th, 2012
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E. Coli rebrands itself ‘Eco. Li’

E.Coli, a leading bacterium in the food poisoning industry, has confirmed it is renaming all 400 trillion of itself as ‘Eco. Li’ with immediate effect in a bid to improve its image and promote its environmentally friendly corporate outlook.

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Posted: Aug 1st, 2012
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Thames Jubilee Pageant to include celebratory whaling

Heavily armed Prince Philip to ask if whales 'have come far?'Fans of old-time nautical industries are celebrating yet another government U-turn, after Environment Secretary Caroline Spelman caved in to public pressure and announced that the Diamond Jubilee Pageant will include a live demonstration of whale-hunting in the Thames.

‘Tens of thousands of people will be gathered to celebrate the Jubilee along the banks of our brownest river ,’ Spelman said at a hastily-arranged press conference. ‘And now they can cheer all the louder as we turn it a much more patriotic red.’

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Posted: May 31st, 2012
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