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Posts Tagged ‘Eton’

Cameron to celebrate victory with Bullingdon-style trashing of UK

it's only moneyOne ‘almighty bash’ planned to last until 2015.

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Posted: Apr 15th, 2015
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Rocketing private school prices spark fears of elitism

best education comes in small packages - usually brown envelopes stuffed with cashA report showing that Private School fees are at an all-time high has triggered fears that the institutions could become ‘elitist’ and ‘against the principle of equality of opportunity’.

New analysis shows that, because of rising demand from Middle Eastern oil barons, Russian political exiles and South American drug lords, school fees have, on average, trebled in the past thirty years; pricing out all but the richest from access to top rated schools.

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Posted: Mar 18th, 2015
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David Cameron: ‘Unemployed young can muck out my stables’

The Conservative Party has promised to come down hard on young ne’er do wells, by compelling them to ‘polish Tory silverware’. Rather than being an Etonian euphemism, the aim is to put those without employment or training into meaningful community work; such as cleaning moats, feeding the pheasants and handing out lemon-grass scented hand towels.

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Posted: Feb 17th, 2015
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Eton declared ‘inadequate’ for producing mediocre politicians

'Just enough is not good enough'The National Union of Teachers has called for Eton College to be placed in ‘special measures’ as soon as possible because the elitist educational establishment has continued to produce students who have gone on to become substandard politicians.

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Posted: Feb 2nd, 2015
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Aliens discovered on Earth, being educated at Eton

Maths professor Alan Daley has worked out the true cause of crop circles after his son started attending a minor public school in Kent and he began to delve into the complex maths of how public schools structure their fees.

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Posted: Sep 28th, 2014
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