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Posts Tagged ‘football’

Boy George denied England captaincy because he was ‘no good at football’

In the next chapter of ‘I’m a fading celebrity with a book launch coming up’, Boy George has declared that he would have been ‘a shoo-in’ to captain the England football team into ‘at least two world cups’, but for the discrimination directed towards him by the FA because he was ‘completely useless at football’, having shown utter ineptitude for the sport at school and giving up playing soon afterwards to pursue a career in music.

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Posted: Mar 4th, 2014
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Sky Sports launch new 4D service called ‘Actually-Going-to-the-Match’

it's almost as if you're there‘It looks like you’re there; it sounds like you’re there; if you sit too near the toilet it even smells like you’re there.’

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Posted: Feb 18th, 2014
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Girlfriend forced to rely upon romance of non-league football on Valentines Day

boyfriend misses open goalOn the evening when couples throughout the nation lovingly stare into each other’s eyes, Emily Laker is resigned to being taken by her boyfriend to see his beloved Hyde United playing at Worcester in the Blue Square Bet North League.

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Posted: Feb 14th, 2014
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Shearer under investigation for prolonged use of ‘inverse quenelle’ celebration

Legendary ex-England footballer, turned-pundit, Alan Shearer, could face retrospective action if found guilty of a career’s use of the so-called ‘inverse-quenelle’ salute as his celebration for scoring.

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Posted: Jan 25th, 2014
More from Sport, UK News


Summer World Cup back on: Qatar to cool temperatures with gay marriages

2022 World Cup hosts Qatar have decided to allow ‘a small number’ of gay marriages in an attempt to bring some moderate winds and light rainfall so that the competition can be held in the summer, inspired by the ravings of UKIP councillor David Silvester.

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Posted: Jan 22nd, 2014
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