David Cameron has announced earlier today the discovery of ‘coal’ by a team of geologists in South Yorkshire. Coal is a scarce carbon-based resource used to produce energy, which has fuelled the economies of many nations and has the potential to do the same here, the PM asserted.
Posted: Jan 14th, 2014
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With the cost of policing protests at its test drilling site in Sussex spiralling out of control, energy firm Cuadrilla has decided to try Plan B. Starting next week, it will begin fracking for oil and gas in an equally large and equally immobile site, the Communities and Local Government Secretary Eric Pickles. There are some major logistical challenges to overcome, the firm admitted.
Posted: Aug 23rd, 2013
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‘Ms Lucas has been reported flashing her values for all to see,’ said a spokesman for Sussex constabulary. ‘This is a clear attempt to expose the young and impressionable to the concept of duty, solidarity and lentil soup. Clearly she must be stopped.’
Posted: Aug 21st, 2013
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Despite raising fears about the impact of fracking, the Daily Mail has conceded that it embarked on its own secret fracking campaign after its reserves of vitriol began to run low.
Posted: Jun 22nd, 2013
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Exploratory abdominal surgery on the Duke of Edinburgh has exposed gas reserves much ‘bigger than first thought’. The operation, under general anaesthetic, has revealed upwards of 170 trillion cubic feet of natural gas and will pave the way for the licensing to exploit further Royals.
Posted: Jun 9th, 2013
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