David Cameron has announced earlier today the discovery of ‘coal’ by a team of geologists in South Yorkshire. Coal is a scarce carbon-based resource used to produce energy, which has fuelled the economies of many nations and has the potential to do the same here, [read...]
With the cost of policing protests at its test drilling site in Sussex spiralling out of control, energy firm Cuadrilla has decided to try Plan B. Starting next week, it will begin fracking for oil and gas in an equally large and equally immobile site, [read...]
‘Ms Lucas has been reported flashing her values for all to see,’ said a spokesman for Sussex constabulary. ‘This is a clear attempt to expose the young and impressionable to the concept of duty, solidarity and lentil soup. [read...]
Exploratory abdominal surgery on the Duke of Edinburgh has exposed gas reserves much ‘bigger than first thought’. The operation, under general anaesthetic, has revealed upwards of 170 trillion cubic feet of natural gas and will pave the way for the licensing to exploit further Royals. [read...]
Gay men have declared fracking to be ‘a bit meh’, and have chosen not to include it in their lexicon of naughty experimental sex. [read...]
