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Posts Tagged ‘France’

Catwalk model floats away

A size-zero catwalk model has been reported missing from a Paris fashion show after it appears she just floated away. Sindy Skellet, 23, who last year achieved fame for dating Brad Pitt without his knowledge, and was recently forced to endure lengthy courses of helium injections by her agency, just took off at the open air show on the Champs Elysees.

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Posted: Oct 22nd, 2015
More from News In Brief

France ends refugee crisis by bombing Syria

With barely 10,000 refugees arriving at the Hungarian border in the last few days, many in the EU were starting to panic that we might run out of dispossessed masses, reasons to vote UKIP or emotive photographs of a child’s abandoned shoe. Fortunately the French government has sprung into action with air strikes in Syria, so as to force the remaining cowering citizens to emigrate using the nearest raft.

NATO members offered their support for the French bombing policy, which had already done such a remarkable job of bringing peace and stability to Iraq before it. In turn the British Prime Minister, David Cameron – who spent much of last year railing against Bashar al-Assad – has now endorsed him as a perfect ‘transitional President’ as Syria transitions from 2016 AD to 2016 BC.

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Posted: Sep 29th, 2015
More from World News

Daily Mail holds swearing-at ceremony for new French president

Will this man cause the price of your house to CRASH? Speccy French git could give you cancer

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Posted: May 20th, 2015
More from From The Archives

Thousands flee England to escape SNP tyranny

No-one can repulse the 'Devils in skirts'There were chaotic scenes across England today as tens of thousands of people fled the country rather than stay and face up to the prospect of the Scottish National Party taking power. The crisis reached a tipping point as today’s Daily Mail front page headline, ‘Scottish Natzis coming to kill your families and drive down house prices’, triggered widespread panic.

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Posted: Apr 21st, 2015
More from Politics

Police smash internet Francophile ring

Police found traces of foie grasRingleaders distributed sickening photos of historic French landmarks and idyllic rural scenery.

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Posted: Mar 11th, 2015
More from From The Archives