‘The pair I got were really pricey. I’d take them to celebrity parties and we’d drink like crazy. Next morning, I’d be really hung over and the melons would be blotchy and a bit dented, but they were never more beautiful to me.’
Posted: Feb 6th, 2013
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A YouGov poll has revealed that most British families keep everything in their fruit bowls apart from fruit. Car keys, bills, things that need repairing, washers and disposable lighters topped the list, with one respondent claiming to keep her Fiat 500 in her fruit bowl.
Posted: Sep 24th, 2012
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Responding to a recent MPs’ report calling for a re-think of alcohol guidelines in the UK, the Portman Group – a body representing the alcoholic drinks industry – has proposed ‘re-imagining’ current Department of Health recommendations on maximum weekly alcohol consumption of 21 units into a promotion for ‘your healthful 3-a-day’.
Posted: Jan 9th, 2012
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‘His face started to turn a disgustingly healthy shade of pink. We knew at once something was wrong.’
Posted: Aug 11th, 2010
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A team of British scientists have developed a range of condom flavoured fruits, in an attempt to improve the diet of ‘sex-addicted British teenagers’. Research shows that teenagers dislike the unfamiliar taste of fresh fruit and vegetables and so the hope is that they may be tempted to try them if they come in more familiar flavours.
Posted: Feb 17th, 2008
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