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Posts Tagged ‘GCSE’

New English GCSE to require all answers to be less than 140-characters

Efforts to modernise the dated GCSE English syllabus have been announced by the Department for Education today. All GCSE English answers will be required to adhere to the 140-character limit to prepare students for a future in social media.

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Posted: Aug 8th, 2014
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GCSE student devastated after being awarded a grade B

While pupils celebrated record-breaking GCSE results today Linda Chaplin was left shocked and disappointed after being awarded the first grade B in the UK for nearly thirteen years.

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Posted: Aug 25th, 2011
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Drama ‘a bit rubbish’, agree drama teachers

The National Conference of Drama Teachers has today issued a statement reluctantly accepting the widely-held view that Drama is a bit rubbish.

In a melodramatic press conference a spokesman conceded ‘We have finally agreed to stop leaping to the defence of Drama. We accept now that all the well-intentioned justifications of creative maturity, team-building and developing the individual’s confidence were delusional, and admit that kids just prefer running around, pretending and dressing up to proper subjects like Maths and Science.’

Dorothy Jensen, head of Drama at Lancaster Grammar School added ‘I took Drama at GCSE and all I’ve got to show for it is a frustrating career as a drama teacher. I wish I’d done Business Studies instead.’

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Posted: Nov 13th, 2009
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Teachers lament declining standards of parent-written coursework

'Well, I'd say it was completely this, but it's, like, totally up to you...'‘Parents are consistently failing to reach the standard of sham coursework required for GCSE and A-Level.’

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Posted: Nov 4th, 2009
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Jubilation as Yoda finally passes GCSE English

exams easier not getting‘very pleased I am!’

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Posted: Sep 9th, 2009
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