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Posts Tagged ‘general election’

Nick Clegg ‘bricking it’ at prospect of entering government

Nick Clegg has spoken of his consternation that, despite being a Liberal Democrat, he may end up in a position of responsibility by the end of the week.

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Posted: May 11th, 2010
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Alien conquest of Britain thwarted after invaders demand: ‘Take us to your leader’

As coalition talks continue, an alien conquest of Britain has been averted after nobody could fulfil the invaders’ initial ultimatum to ‘Take us to your leader’.

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Posted: May 10th, 2010
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Iran and North Korea praise UK for ‘free and fair’ election

World leaders as diverse as Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Hamid Karzai and Kim Jong-il were lining up today to endorse the UK general election as a shining example of the democratic process.

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Posted: May 7th, 2010
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Public worried about missing election coverage by turning out to vote

Exit polls are predicting a disappointing turnout in today’s general election as members of the public worry about missing the uninterrupted television coverage while they leave the house to exercise their democratic right.

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Posted: May 6th, 2010
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Labour landslide as grateful Brown makes Mugabe Chancellor

Everything the fault of the UK government. Oh, er no, hang on...Fears of a hung parliament have been forgotten as indications point to a landslide victory for Labour with an incredible 98.6% of the popular vote. Gordon Brown has been quick to reward his campaign manager, Robert Mugabe, brought in secretly last week in a last-ditch attempt to avoid defeat, with the post of Chancellor of the Exchequer.

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Posted: May 5th, 2010
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