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Posts Tagged ‘George Bush’

White House staff ‘getting bored’ by Obama’s Indonesian childhood anecdotes

Employees at the White House have confessed that continued stories about the President’s exotic upbringing in Hawaii and Indonesia and his work in the poorest areas of Chicago have ceased to be inspiring and now ‘tend to go on a bit’.

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Posted: May 20th, 2009
More from News In Brief

Bush still struggling to explain eight-year gap on CV

More than two months after leaving the White House, former US President George W Bush is still having trouble putting together a credible cover-story for prospective employers explaining how he has spent the last eight years. Bush had anticipated no shortage of offers from multinationals after he left office in January, but aides were quick to advise him that for reasons no one fully understands, the downturn in the global economy appears to have coincided with a drop in demand for the kind of leadership that put him on the political map. ‘I just don’t understand it,’ he said today. ‘I thought we loved winners in this country.’

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Posted: Apr 2nd, 2009
More from World News

Bush forced to repeat a term after failing end-of-year exams

America today woke up to the news that George W. Bush will remain US president for a further four years after officials from the Electoral College ruled that he had failed to secure the grades needed to graduate from the White House. A sub-clause of the US Constitution requires a serving president to be held back and forced to repeat a term if he does not make the necessary progress.

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Posted: Jan 20th, 2009
More from Politics, World News

World nervous as Ahmadinejad draws Bush in UN ‘Secret Santa’

Opportunity for Iran to thank America for making the world a safer place.

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Posted: Dec 4th, 2008
More from World News

Bush new rescue plan ‘is to collect up all the 5 cent water bottles’


George Bush today revealed the detail on a new economic rescue package which it was hoped would pull America back from the brink of financial ruin. Less complex than the previous plan rejected by Washington, the President is proposing simply to collect up the empty mineral water bottles that can be exchanged for 5 cents at the recycling centre, and pay off America’s $700 billion debt that way.

‘It works out as only 14000 billion empty plastic bottles’ explained one upbeat White House aide, ‘And the President already collected about thirty. We are tidying up the streets of our cities AND solving America’s debt crisis so it is a win-win solution.’

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Posted: Sep 30th, 2008
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