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Posts Tagged ‘government’

Cameron to give Satan ‘second chance’ as No.10 press secretary

important to have connectionsPrime Minister David Cameron has today denied accusations of poor judgement after confirming that he has appointed Satan, former overseer of hell, as his new director of communications in Downing Street.

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Posted: Jul 19th, 2014
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Aromatherapists ‘winning the war’ on limb replacement treatment

Aromatherapist claimed that a ‘woman in Japan’ had re-attached the arm of a man by using a ‘jasmine and lavender infusion’.

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Posted: Jul 13th, 2014
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MI5 to outsource surveillance to Google

MI6 getting in on it as well, but that's a secret‘Opportunity to opt out on page 123 of privacy policy terms and conditions.’

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Posted: Jul 11th, 2014
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Internet now with ‘Auto-Adolf-Comparison’ feature

A new internet feature is being activated which auto-corrects all similes and metaphors so that they reference Hitler.

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Posted: Jul 2nd, 2014
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EU admits ‘90% of policies are solely to annoy Farage’

EU Commission President Jose Manuel Barroso has admitted to journalists that most of the decisions made by the EU are now designed with the sole purpose of winding up UKIP leader Nigel Farage.

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Posted: Jun 1st, 2014
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