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Posts Tagged ‘Gregg Wallace’

Gregg Wallace fixed grin device cures depression, provokes violence

‘Why the long face?’ is a question that may soon be relegated to the past thanks to the release of the incredible Gregg Wallace fixed-grin device. Fitting neatly and invisibly into the corners of the mouth ‘The Wallace’ claims to turn all frowns upside down in a nano-second. Anger management specialists and medical practitioners are hailing the device as an amazing alternative to anti-depressants and expensive courses of therapy.

‘Valium, librium and mogadon once seemed to provide the perfect answer to stress,’ said Dr Hilda Radcliffe from her Harley Street clinic, ‘but The Wallace comes without any of the typical side-affects, such as altering the chemistry of the brain and turning people into vegetables. However, it is not without its problems and patients do need to take care where and when they wear it.’

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Posted: Nov 14th, 2015
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Fear grow that missing Masterchef pair may have disappeared up own bums

‘During the final we feared that Gregg was going to spontaneously combust’

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Posted: Dec 17th, 2014
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