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Posts Tagged ‘Hadrians Wall’

Tories to rebuild Hadrian’s Wall

The Conservatives have announced plans to rebuild Hadrian’s Wall in a massive new infrastructure project that will create up to 100,000 new jobs. Project costs of £50 billion will be met by scrapping the controversial HS2 rail project. The wall is to be modelled on the DMZ that divides North and South Korea and will be renamed the ‘Thatcher parallel’.

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Posted: May 20th, 2015
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‘Actually we won,’ claims SNP

‘Truth is, we ran rings around them Sassenachs,’ he said in a confidential briefing, about to be published in Wikileaks. ‘We didnae want full independence – that was just a negotiating ploy. We wanted more tax powers, more oil revenue and less interference from London. We got a’ that and more.’

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Posted: Sep 21st, 2014
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MOD planning ‘massive exercise’ north of Hadrian’s Wall

Och aye, the newsMembers of the Royal Irish Regiment are said to be catching the evening Stranraer ferry, thus enacting an elegant ‘pincer movement’.

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Posted: Sep 18th, 2014
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Salmond stonewalls Hadrian queries

Amid fears that MPs are gerrymandering the Independence Referendum, stonemasons have begun restoration work to Hadrian’s Wall. As one concerned voter said: ‘They’re lumping us Scots together with the most undesirable parts of England. Who’s even heard of Dudley?’

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Posted: Oct 22nd, 2013
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David Hasselhoff hunted by police after Hadrian’s Wall disturbance

Police are appealing to David Hasselhoff to hand himself in following a disturbance near Hadrian’s Wall yesterday, in which Mr Hasselhoff was alleged to have damaged a small section of the 2000-year-old Roman monument.

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Posted: Jul 30th, 2010
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