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Posts Tagged ‘Heathrow’

Parachuting passengers into airports ‘could reduce need for new runways’

With opposition to every plan of airport capacity expansion revealed in a report this morning, the government are going to look at the last viable option on the table: allowing visitors to the UK to parachute from their plane somewhere near their preferred airport.

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Posted: Dec 17th, 2013
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Newly discovered Roman documents show ancient dispute over ‘third highway’

all roads lead to Heathrovium‘This important find, dating back to 50AD, documents the arguments over a proposed third Highway out of Londinium,’ the Chief archaeologist explained.

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Posted: Sep 8th, 2012
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London’s new airport will be underground, promises Boris Johnson

A high-speed tunnel leading to the runway will start at Dover, marked by a giant bullseye on the white cliffs.

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Posted: Jul 11th, 2012
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UK Border Agency asks illegal immigrants ‘not to wear sports kit’ during Olympics

"they come over here, steal our tracksuits..."The UK Border Agency (UKBA) has given assurances that it is ‘completely ready’ to deal with the influx of foreigners during the Olympics, as long as illegal immigrants agree not to wear sports kit over the summer.

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Posted: May 3rd, 2012
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Suitcase with pink ribbon tied to handle goes missing

But Professor of Logic at Oxford University, James Searle, said the theory required that the black suitcase belonging to the passenger who had taken Mrs Moran’s black suitcase in error should have remained on the carousal. ‘It’s a tough one, but as a matter of logic it just doesn’t stack up,’ Professor Searle said.

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Posted: Jun 24th, 2011
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