NewsBiscuit

The news written by you…

Posts Tagged ‘Home Office’

Stop & Search to be replaced by Slap n’ Tickle

While the inquest into Mark Duggan’s death may have exonerated officers, the Independent Police Complaints Commission is expected to recommend a radical overhaul of community policing, acts of foreplay and anything involving inflatable fruit. With over 27% of stop and search actions lacking ‘legitimacy’, the Home Office had strongly recommend a more flirtatious approach by law enforcement agencies.

Read more >

Posted: Jan 10th, 2014
More from News In Brief



Lawyers, judges in secret courts to wear ‘sinister’ wigs

Images of a new range of ‘surreal’ judicial wigs, whose purpose is to ‘terrify and intimidate’ suspects appearing before secret courts, has been leaked to the press.

The Home Office would neither confirm nor deny the wigs’ existence, but sources inside the Ministry of Justice said the wigs were aimed at creating a ‘sinister, nightmarish and deeply unfashionable’ atmosphere inside the hush-hush courts.

Read more >

Posted: Jun 18th, 2013
More from News In Brief



European Court rules God cannot cast Lucifer out of Heaven

The omnipresent supreme being, God, has expressed his disappointment after the European Court refused to overturn a ruling preventing him from casting out the senior radical anticleric Lucifer, commonly known as Satan, from Heaven.

Read more >

Posted: Apr 26th, 2013
More from News In Brief



Theresa May ‘even tried Cillit Bang’ to remove Abu Qatada

After an appeal to the courts delayed extradition proceedings, Home Secretary Theresa May has defended the government’s attempts to remove stubborn extremist Abu Qatada using kitchen power-cleaner Cillit Bang.

Read more >

Posted: Apr 20th, 2012
More from News In Brief



Home Secretary backs US extradition demand for KFC napkin thief

stopped before he could hack into secret recipe of eleven different herbs and spices“It is alleged the gang would order a KFC meal, usually a Bargain Bucket with an extra side of fries or a Tango orange and then wait until the waitress had turned her back before stuffing their pockets full of napkins and then making their escape on foot through the front door.”

Read more >

Posted: Apr 11th, 2012
More from UK News