‘We rather feel that if a childless man is to be granted nocturnal access to the bedrooms of millions of children around the world, he should submit to some basic investigation.’
Posted: Dec 4th, 2009
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Hollie Steel who won the nation’s heart singing Edelweiss on Britain’s Got Talent is to be appointed as the new Home Secretary in a desperate bid to stop everybody attacking the government. The plucky ten year old who broke down in tears after losing her way half way through the Sound of Music classic is believed to have minimal political experience, but in the current climate, the Prime Minister has judged that this may be to his government’s advantage.
David Cameron at first seemed unsure how to react to the surprise appointment, eventually praising it by ad-libbing that ‘this little girl has got nerves of steel, and, erm, her name is Hollie Steel.’ Another MP said that they hoped the appointment of a ten year old might go some way to ending late night sittings in the House of Commons as the new Home Secretary was normally in bed by eight.
Posted: Jun 3rd, 2009
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The Government has agreed to remove thousands of samples of DNA from the national database belonging to bats, frogs, geckos and field mice, over the next 3-5 years.
Posted: May 8th, 2009
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Images feature the major Labour ministers in ‘relaxed and artistic’ poses carrying out their ministerial duties completely in the buff.
Posted: Mar 30th, 2009
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‘You are actually more likely to get knocked down by a car than have a big hairy poisonous spider crawl into your ear when you are asleep’
Posted: Aug 29th, 2008
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