‘It would be quite handy if some public-spirited journalist was picking up my messages for me then printing them in large type in a newspaper.’
Posted: Jul 8th, 2011
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‘T-Day is upon us,’ town crier and sartorial policy maker Marvin Burridge told a torch-bearing mob. ‘Failure to change over in a timely manner will result in a noticeable degradation in your street-cred.’
Posted: May 5th, 2011
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‘Our centre offers the perfect place to keep the island’s key demographic occupied,’ said founder, Margret Briscoe, ‘and is ideally situated just a short bus ride from Sandown’s glamorous benches, bingo halls and fracture clinic.’
Posted: Apr 14th, 2011
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Roy Walsh, a retired civil servant from Freshwater, Isle of Wight, is continuing to defy a large gang of adults and children who, he claims, have camped outside his house with lanterns and songsheets, demanding to be served figgy pudding.
Posted: Dec 19th, 2010
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Council officials on the Isle of Wight have extended an island-wide ban on topless sunbathing to overweight men, it has been revealed today. From Colwell to Yaverland, specially-trained wardens will patrol the island’s beaches and issue fines to anyone caught transgressing the ban.
Posted: Jul 14th, 2010
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