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Posts Tagged ‘Israel’

Middle East crisis solved on Twitter

Netanyahu still hasn't been toldThere were jubilant scenes across the Middle East last night, as the bitter dispute between Israel and its Arab neighbours finally ended, thanks to a series of Tweets from two individuals on opposite sides of the argument.

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Posted: Dec 7th, 2012
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District Council turns down Israeli planning application for 3000 new homes

‘As council leaders we were worried about the loss of visual amenity to local people and the pressure it would put on local roads and schools. We are committed to keeping the green belt intact at all costs’.

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Posted: Dec 5th, 2012
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Laboratoires Garnier chosen to test Arafat remains

A spokesbeauty for Garnier said, ‘We suspect polonium-210, but we’re not ruling out other possibilities, such as alpha hydroxy acids, pro-retinol, jojoba oil, pH-balancing rhino jizz or even aqua.’

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Posted: Nov 30th, 2012
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London kebab shop destroyed in Israeli raid on Hummus

There were fresh calls for an immediate ceasefire in the war torn Middle East last night after an Israeli F16 jet fighter targeted and destroyed a kebab shop in Upton Park East London leaving the proprietor and 12 customers dead. It is believed the tragic mix up occurred when the pilot was told to “Get me some hummus” by his flight commander

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Posted: Nov 21st, 2012
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Nations begin traditional Christmas warfare

potential for worst nuclear winter since records beganCountries around the world have begun bombing each other in the run up to Christmas.

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Posted: Nov 19th, 2012
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