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Posts Tagged ‘James Bond’

Prescott turns down James Bond as ‘too misogynisticatal’

John Prescott has declined the role of James Bond because he felt the role was ‘a bit sexist’ and ‘lacked the scholasticated gravitas’ he would naturally bring to any performance, despite the inevitability of any public ballot for the role means that fans will overwhelmingly vote for him, particularly the ladies.

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Posted: Aug 17th, 2015
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Guardian urges readers to vote for first LGBT 007

‘A James Bond for the 21st century has to reflect the new century’s gender diversity as part of its core values, which is why we urge readers to vote for Grayson Perry as the new 007.’

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Posted: Aug 15th, 2015
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James Bond resigns from MI5 citing ‘too much paperwork’

ready to killExcessive paperwork, political correctness and boring villain’s lairs have made life unbearable.

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Posted: May 21st, 2015
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Self-destruct buttons are ‘a needless risk’

A health and safety watchdog has condemned self-destruct buttons as ‘dangerous and completely pointless’ in a review for the government published this week.

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Posted: Jul 20th, 2014
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Release of new 007 movie in doubt after James Bond ‘hopelessly compromised’ by endless TV appearances

licensed to make a killingThe new 007 film ‘Skyfall’ may never be released after MI5 became concerned that the secret agent at the heart of the operation, James Bond, has become so famous that he can’t go anywhere without being recognised. To allow him to continue with the missions planned for the film would be to put his and possibly many others’ livelihoods at risk, the intelligence agency confirmed.

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Posted: Oct 9th, 2012
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