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Posts Tagged ‘Jeremy Hunt’

Jeremy Hunt ‘suffering from meddling-citis, doctors say

The General Medical Council has today declared that Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt is suffering from a disease dubbed ‘meddling-citis’, a pathological inability to keep out of affairs of others who really do know better. To treat this, it has recommended that he be knocked unconscious with a speculum and treated with strong antibiotics well away from Parliament.

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Posted: Aug 20th, 2015
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‘Jeremy Hunt shouldn’t work any days at all’, say doctors

National Self ServiceThe British Medical Association warned today that standards of patient care were being put at risk by Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt repeatedly travelling to his office and making fumbling attempts at doing his job.

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Posted: Jul 21st, 2015
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NHS to buy all drugs ‘from a guy called Phil’

With the NHS now shown to be paying too much for medication, the National Institute for Health and Care Excellence (NICE) has centralised its purchasing by awarding a contract to a man known as ‘Phil’, who impressed a member of the purchasing team with a promise to deliver ‘top notch stuff’ at ‘well below the going rate’ during a chance encounter in a London nightclub.

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Posted: Feb 19th, 2015
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Health Minister abolishes ‘NICE’; launches ‘NASTY’

Asked what this stood for, the Health Minister looked puzzled and said ‘It doesn’t stand for anything, that’s just its name.’

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Posted: Jan 13th, 2015
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‘Here comes the big aeroplane’ parents given all-clear to resume feeding

still concerns that Mr Choo-Choo could be affected by leavesYoung mothers across Southern England breathed a collective sigh of relief after Health Secretary Jeremy Hunt announced that so-called ‘Here comes the big aeroplane’ spoon-feeding techniques could safely resume.

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Posted: Dec 14th, 2014
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