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Crucifixion of Jesus ‘may have been a DIY accident’
‘He may have got in a tangle attempting to put up some shelves’ [read...]
Tagged Jesus Christ
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Churches to open despite two-metre distancing from Jesus
The government responsible for a near-catastrophic covid-19 response has announced that churches and other places of worship are set to reopen from 15 June. A taskforce including faith leaders was launched last month to develop a plan to enable the phased and safe reopening of religious buildings, [read...]
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Doctor who signed Jesus’ death certificate struck off
A doctor is facing professional ruin after a man he pronounced dead was later seen walking around Galilee in perfect health. The disgraced medic says that he didn’t have time to look closely at the alleged corpse before signing the papers, [read...]
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‘Is this cellulite in an ancient picture of Mary Magdalene?’ asks Daily Mail
‘Close analysis of the picture shows that Mary Magdalene is displaying obvious signs of cellulite,’ wrote lifestyle analyst Liz Jones. ‘Worse still, her hair is all over the place. Ooh darling, that’s a fashion disaster. [read...]
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Modern-day Moses receives Commandments 2.0 on iPad tablet
The direct, unadulterated word of God was passed down to a Nuneaton man in the form of an updated set of commandments, saved on a brand new Apple iPad tablet. [read...]