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Posts Tagged ‘Jesus Christ’

Jesus still working on ‘difficult’ second coming

star admits he's kept fans waiting 'too long'‘You’ve got to strike that difficult balance between giving fans more of what they want and taking things on artistically.’

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Posted: Mar 10th, 2015
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God ‘gutted’ after Jesus signs for Islam on a free contract

Jesus‘the time’s now right to move out of my comfort zone and try something new.‘

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Posted: Jan 18th, 2015
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Outrage in Calvary as emergency services took three days to respond

Angry residents are demanding an immediate investigation into the case of a crucified man with serious injuries to his hands, feet and side who had to wait three days for paramedics to arrive on the scene.

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Posted: Mar 30th, 2013
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Image of Jesus appears on Jeremy Clarkson’s teeth

An image of Jesus has appeared on Jeremy Clarkson’s teeth, the first holy endorsement of the car journalist’s ‘motor mouth’.

‘Just because I’m on TV people think I should have perfect teeth but I’m not a homosexual so I don’t go to the dentist’, insisted Clarkson. The phenomenon caused Clarkson to analyse his greatness, and draw some startling comparisons with the Son of God.

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Posted: Jul 28th, 2012
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‘Is this cellulite in an ancient picture of Mary Magdalene?’ asks Daily Mail

princess last week, harlot this - house prices are going to suffer‘Close analysis of the picture shows that Mary Magdalene is displaying obvious signs of cellulite,’ wrote lifestyle analyst Liz Jones. ‘Worse still, her hair is all over the place. Ooh darling, that’s a fashion disaster. Call yourself an icon? You’ve let yourself go – you’re a disgrace to women everywhere.’

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Posted: Jun 14th, 2012
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