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Posts Tagged ‘Jesus Christ’

Image of Jesus appears on Jeremy Clarkson’s teeth

An image of Jesus has appeared on Jeremy Clarkson’s teeth, the first holy endorsement of the car journalist’s ‘motor mouth’.

‘Just because I’m on TV people think I should have perfect teeth but I’m not a homosexual so I don’t go to the dentist’, insisted Clarkson. The phenomenon caused Clarkson to analyse his greatness, and draw some startling comparisons with the Son of God.

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Posted: Jul 28th, 2012
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‘Is this cellulite in an ancient picture of Mary Magdalene?’ asks Daily Mail

princess last week, harlot this - house prices are going to suffer‘Close analysis of the picture shows that Mary Magdalene is displaying obvious signs of cellulite,’ wrote lifestyle analyst Liz Jones. ‘Worse still, her hair is all over the place. Ooh darling, that’s a fashion disaster. Call yourself an icon? You’ve let yourself go – you’re a disgrace to women everywhere.’

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Posted: Jun 14th, 2012
More from Faith, Lifestyle



Jesus loses in ‘Masterchef – The Deities’ final following disappointing ‘loaves and fishes’ dish

Fans of the BBC’s popular ‘Masterchef – The Deities’ series were left reeling last night as odds-on favourite Jesus Christ fell at the last hurdle, handing victory on a plate to rank outsider Buddha.

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Posted: Apr 7th, 2012
More from Celebrity, Faith



Jesus suspended for wearing cross at work

Health and safety decided it could cause a bit of painful chafingJesus of Nazareth was suspended today after wearing a cross to work. Simon, also known as Peter, or Rocky to his mates, sales manager of a small collective of preachers and miracle workers, said their founder and chief executive Jesus had been behaving increasingly irrationally recently and yesterday had abandoned the group during a breakout session in the Garden of Gethsemane.

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Posted: Apr 21st, 2011
More from World News



Jesus accused of using ghost writers for ‘The Bible’

The revelations will rock the man regarded by many as The Good Lord, coming so soon after damaging accusations that his book was a cynical attempt to exploit the Christmas market.

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Posted: Dec 27th, 2010
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