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Posts Tagged ‘Jihad’

‘Please stop killing each other in my name, I don’t exist,’ clarifies God

‘I don’t care what you call me – Allah, God, Yahweh, Vishnu, the Flying Spaghetti Monster, whatever – It really doesn’t matter because I don’t exist’.

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Posted: Apr 3rd, 2014
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Al-Qaeda postpones terror campaign until end of Strictly and X-Factor

bombing Dusseldorf to wait until Anne's danced the rumbaAl-Qaeda is struggling to secure sufficient numbers of bombers during the current series of Strictly Come Dancing and X-Factor.

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Posted: Nov 25th, 2013
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Robert Peston deployed to Afghanistan as a manned drone

He's NEV-er seen ANythinggg! LIKE it‘Peston’s role will be to reconnoitre enemy terrain, identify Taliban insurgents and then subdue them by talking for hours in his excruciatingly slow, dull monotone,’ explained the Defence Secretary.

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Posted: Jul 12th, 2012
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Acme corporation investigated over arms sales

The discovery of Jihadi style videos featuring a terrorist who goes by the name of “Wile E. Coyote” has prompted raids by officers from Homeland Security on the US headquarters of the Acme Corporation.

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Posted: Nov 11th, 2009
More from News In Brief

Suicide bomber sees himself ‘more in a management role’

‘Driving a car loaded with explosives into the wall of the Green Zone might not be making the best use of my abilities’

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Posted: Jul 27th, 2008
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