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Posts Tagged ‘john lewis’

Missing man found ‘alive and frightened’ in John Lewis

A man who has been missing since Christmas Eve has finally been found, bewildered and disorientated, in a John Lewis department store in Edinburgh.

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Posted: Mar 24th, 2014
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Marriage in crisis as husband eschews Christmas sex in favour of cash alternative

same old present, year after yearThe 22-year union between Lionel and Marjorie Alwyn was reportedly under threat last night, as it emerged that Mr Alwyn had declined their traditional festive sexual congress and asked ‘for the money instead’.

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Posted: Dec 13th, 2013
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John Lewis Bear massacres cute woodland creatures

‘When you’re enjoying the single most satisfying kip of the year, the last thing you need is some smartarse setting an alarm clock for the end of December!

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Posted: Nov 8th, 2013
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Debenhams retain police suspect blanket contract

Debenhams bosses were ‘delighted’ after it was announced that their store had won the contract to provide all the UK’s police forces with the blankets used to cover suspects’ heads as they enter and leave court buildings.

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Posted: Apr 7th, 2011
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