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Posts Tagged ‘judges’

X-Factor panel to be replaced by actual judges

'You didn't own that song. Give it back.'In an effort to combat accusations of bias amongst the celebrity judging panel in the forthcoming high-profile final of the X-Factor, the current panel will be replaced by a more traditional panel of judges.

Taking the place of Louis Walsh will be Lord Chief Justice “Clockwork Duck” Thomas, a QC since 1984 and appointed a high court judge in 1996. Lord Thomas commented ‘It is an honour to be asked to preside over this presigious event, and I have treated to myself to a new gavel which I will use to stop any disruption. I may find the summing-up difficult as I am not a great singer, and may have to mime, but the audience, or as we call it, jury, will get the idea.’

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Posted: Dec 12th, 2014
More from Arts/Entertainment



Lawyers riot at prospect of poor people in court

Send them down, or, if M'lud permits, up.Wigs flew, gowns were ripped and silk breeches muddied as senior members of the British Judiciary rioted in the Inns of Court yesterday afternoon. Many senior judges and lawyers say they are ‘at the end of their tether’ at having to preside over criminal cases involving poor people, causing barristers to run amok in London’s famous and historic legal district…

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Posted: Jan 8th, 2014
More from UK News



Kent man wins ‘Cock Drawing of the Year’

Jon Veitch, a 43-year-old QA inspector from Kent, has beaten thousands of others to win Cock Drawing of the Year. Veitch’s simple, pencilled rendition of the male genitalia on 80 gsm plain white A4 paper won him plaudits from the judging panel, who hailed the iconic nature of the piece for its fluid lines and sparsely haired balls.

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Posted: Nov 3rd, 2013
More from News In Brief



Judges just playing hard to get, insists Berlusconi

The three female judges at Silvio Berlusconi’s sex trial only returned a guilty verdict because they were struggling to accept their true feelings for him, claims the former Italian Prime Minister.

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Posted: Jun 25th, 2013
More from News In Brief



Burglar commends bravery of judges

Serial burglar and drug addict Jo Nutjob stunned court attendees when he praised the ‘courage shown by judges’ in sentencing plebs like him on a daily basis.

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Posted: Sep 6th, 2012
More from News In Brief