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Posts Tagged ‘Large Hadron Collider’

Scientists discover ‘anti-policy’ particles by smashing Milibands together

“It was a mistake while they were here on a team-building exercise. As it turns out, they were already on a collision course, we just had to speed them up a little.”

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Posted: Sep 30th, 2011
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Government to regulate scientists with regional accents

Minister for Universities and Science, David Willetts has written to further education establishments in England and Wales requesting that as part of their science courses they introduce mandatory modules on communication skills and elocution.
One government spokesman said the growing trend for ‘normal’ accents is ‘undermining the gravitas and integrity of British science and must stop right now.’

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Posted: Mar 21st, 2011
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Binatone’s version of Large Hadron Collider set to go on sale

product launched on QVCProduct launched on QVC.

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Posted: Feb 19th, 2011
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NASA space probe finds evidence of ‘more bloody stars’

even the spacecraft's had enoughNASA today announced an end to all space exploration after the latest set of photographs taken by its Voyager 1 spacecraft, currently exploring the Kuiper Belt on the edge of the solar system, showed nothing but a bunch of stars that look indistinguishable from those viewed from Earth.

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Posted: Nov 21st, 2010
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Scientists ‘no closer’ to finding a colour for Thursday

A group of theoretical physicists at CERN used unscheduled sessions with the Large Hadron Collider to smash tiny particles of Thursday into 5-litre pots of Dulux.

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Posted: Nov 1st, 2010
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