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Posts Tagged ‘Large Hadron Collider’

Scientists discover ‘anti-policy’ particles by smashing Milibands together

“It was a mistake while they were here on a team-building exercise. As it turns out, they were already on a collision course, we just had to speed them up a little.”

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Posted: Sep 30th, 2011
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Ministers to consider raising the speed of light

‘Increasing the speed limit would reduce the journey time from the sun to the earth from its current sluggish 8 minutes and 19 seconds, bringing enormous economic benefits by increasing the amount of sunlight we receive and potentially lengthening the day.’

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Posted: Sep 30th, 2011
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Government to regulate scientists with regional accents

Minister for Universities and Science, David Willetts has written to further education establishments in England and Wales requesting that as part of their science courses they introduce mandatory modules on communication skills and elocution.
One government spokesman said the growing trend for ‘normal’ accents is ‘undermining the gravitas and integrity of British science and must stop right now.’

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Posted: Mar 21st, 2011
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Binatone’s version of Large Hadron Collider set to go on sale

product launched on QVCProduct launched on QVC.

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Posted: Feb 19th, 2011
More from Business, Science/Technology



Scientists ‘no closer’ to finding a colour for Thursday

A group of theoretical physicists at CERN used unscheduled sessions with the Large Hadron Collider to smash tiny particles of Thursday into 5-litre pots of Dulux.

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Posted: Nov 1st, 2010
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