Prime Minister Theresa May has snapped up all the gaps between the triangles of chocolate in Toblerones, it has been revealed today. The news comes just weeks after manufacturer Mondelez International announced that it was reducing the distance between chunks of the distinctively shaped white confectionary and was reverting to its original shape. [read...]
As one of his first policy announcements after being elected Prime Minister last week, Boris Johnson today indicated that the Government would put forward a bill to reintroduce the traditional Boxing Day Hunt. But rather than the socially unacceptable fox-cull, [read...]
Defence secretary Penny Mordaunt has promised the Ministry of Defence an extra 100 horses after claims that austerity measures have left the UK ill-equipped to deal with the threat of modern warfare. These, she vowed, [read...]
Literary scholars have discovered a long forgotten text from the Nobel prize-winner, in which he describes an austerity-ridden landscape, filled with hapless characters stuck in a limbo of indicative votes. Although, there is some debate as to whether the working title was ‘Waiting for Brexit’, [read...]
Foreword by Liam Fox, International Trade Secretary, ‘Congratulations fellow trade experts! If you are reading this, you have decided to embark on the rewarding journey to become a fully-fledged UK government trade dealer – or the horse tranquiliser has just kicked in. [read...]
