The coalition government has pledged to end the ‘postcode lottery’ of postcode allocation by allowing communities to choose their own postcodes. ‘No longer will people be disadvantaged, or their house prices affected, by the state imposing an alpha-numeric suffix that shows where they live,’ said the Prime Minister yesterday. [read...]
As the MV Darwin left Liverpool bound for the third world, reformed vicar Mike Hartnell contemplated his mission of going to the farthest reaches of the planet and persuading the natives that they ‘really shouldn’t rely too much on all that stuff they were told a little while ago.’ [read...]
South Yorkshire Police has admitted responsibility for everything that has ever been wrong with the great city of Liverpool and the cheeky little scallywags who call it home. The police will also retrospectively apologise for any other grievances Liverpudlians may remember or dream up in future. [read...]
‘We have a dedicated team of trained health professionals looking after Daniel round the clock,’ said chairman Tom Werner. ‘He played in the cup match the other night and we told him to keep his fingers crossed that he would avoid an injury, [read...]
Liverpool ace Daniel Sturridge has been ruled out of contention for six weeks after a terrifying accident at his home. The injury was sustained when the striker tripped and fell into several giant balls of fluffy cotton wool, [read...]
