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Posts Tagged ‘London Olympics’

Nick Clegg launches sinister dating site: ‘Salmond, Farage or Me’

the British public finally has a choice of dirty partnerIn attempt to help voters lose their lunch, the Lib Dems have promoted their answer to C4’s ‘The Undateables’. Offering a stark choice of sexual extremes, Nick Clegg has positioned himself as the ‘moderate filling’, sandwiched between the thick, sweaty slabs of the SNP’s Alex Salmond and UKIP’s Nigel Farage.

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Posted: Apr 15th, 2015
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Olympic legacy under fire for lack of inner city dressage facilities

‘The Olympics were supposed to inspire a generation’, says Hackney youth worker Doreen Phillips, ‘yet our inner cities are still lacking even the most basic equestrian facilities. I work with underprivileged kids who are crying out for a sense of purpose and belonging, and that could be easily provided by forcing horses to dance.’

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Posted: Sep 5th, 2014
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Glasgow kicked out of Commonwealth Games after failing drugs test

Glasgow tested positive for Amphetamine, Barbiturates, Cocaine, Diamorphine, Ecstasy, Feneazepam, Grass, Heroin, Inhalants, Jellies, Ketamine, LSD, Magic Mushrooms, New Psychoactive Substances, Opiates, Puff, Quat, Resin, Smilies, Temazepan, Ultram, Vanilla Sky, Weed, XTC, Yaba and Zoly.

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Posted: Jul 24th, 2014
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Hollywood actress ‘comes out’ as secret diver

The Hollywood star decided to ‘come out’ following rumours in some tabloid newspapers that she had been spotted over the weekend plunging into a swimming pool from a 15ft diving board.

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Posted: Dec 4th, 2013
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Tokyo wins race to host eight years of cynicism

‘It’s important that the winning bid starts with optimism and enthusiasm but that then is soon crushed by the wearing yoke of international cynicism’

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Posted: Sep 16th, 2013
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