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Posts Tagged ‘Manchester United’

Referees to use nail guns to keep feet behind vanishing foam

The FA will ensure that Premier League referees will be better equipped to handle encroachment at free-kicks for the coming season, with the introduction of ‘heavy-duty nail guns’, Chief Executive Richard Scudamore announced today.

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Posted: Aug 7th, 2014
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Unemployed loser mocks David Moyes sacking

A Bristol man who dropped out of school at 14, has never had a job or a girlfriend, lives with his parents and can’t spell has admitted spending the last couple of days poking fun at the former Manchester United manager.

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Posted: Apr 28th, 2014
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Giggs to wear Fergie mask while he manages United

might try superinjunctions to block poor refereeing decisionsHaving been installed as interim manager of Manchester United after the departure of David Moyes, Ryan Giggs is set to allay fears over his lack of managerial experience by wearing a cardboard mask of Sir Alex Ferguson’s face when he arrives to take training.

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Posted: Apr 23rd, 2014
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Grim Reaper traumatised by encounter with David Moyes

‘It was meant to be a supportive gesture,’ said the Reaper. ‘I held the blade close to his face simply to remind him what silverware looked like. But it backfired spectacularly when I smelled the stench of decay.’

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Posted: Apr 21st, 2014
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World leaders express concern as Liverpool annex Man Utd

it's for the best in the long runLeaders around the world have resolutely condemned the annexation of Manchester United football club by Liverpool FC despite a hastily held referendum showing 95.5% support among the Man U fans for secession to its more powerful neighbour.

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Posted: Mar 17th, 2014
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