‘We first announced it with a double page heiroglyphic spread in the Christmas edition of Barker’s Confundulum. I know we’re not exactly Posh and Becks but we were disappointed not to get even one congratulatory sonnet,’ he said.
Posted: Mar 22nd, 2012
More from News In Brief
‘The selfish trollop only married it so that it didn’t get repossessed. She owes £15,000 in mortgage arrears. I feel so sorry for any rooms they end up having.’
Posted: Feb 8th, 2012
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A father from Solihull has encountered a barrage of criticism after his long-suffering wife revealed that ‘chasing the children up the stairs on all fours going ‘Raarrr!!!’ every evening’ was his sole contribution to their upbringing. The nightly routine – which Dan Hurrell, 37, described as, ‘Just a bit of fun, that’s all’ – has, after six years, finally driven his wife, Debbie, to breaking point.
Posted: Sep 29th, 2011
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‘What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger. (Nice try though, Cathy, if you’re reading this.) The important thing is always to learn from what life throws at you, and you don’t get hitched a third of a dozen times without picking up a few pointers along the way.’
Posted: Sep 12th, 2011
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The NHS has come under fire after a Panorama programme showed that it is ‘systematically failing’ lovesick Britons by cutting the number of ‘leurve’ doctors trained to deliver emotional and erotic first aid.
Posted: Aug 30th, 2011
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