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News In Brief
Alice Cooper ‘relishing’ prospect of annual UK royalty cheque
Mazher Mahmood poses as ‘reliable witness’
24-hour ceasefire announced in Gaza to celebrate Prince George’s 1st birthday
No one in Cabinet ‘experienced in anything’
Nonces ‘appalled’ by allegations that some might be MPs
A&E depts missed targets for selling over priced Wispa bars for a whole year
Met Office issues amber ‘nyah, nyah, ne-nyah, nyah’
Foreign students thrive in UK heatwave
Shortest ever middle-east ceasefire proposed
Shock as Ofsted report finds pupil achievement ‘depends on intelligence’
Cameron based reshuffle on Marvel comics’ rebranding of Thor as a woman
Suicide bomber calls in sick with a bellyache
Gove puts 15 MPs into special measures on his first day as chief whip
Church men opposed female bishops because ‘they look better in purple dresses’
Fresh hope of finding MH370 as British passenger’s TV Licence expires
State of Anarchy in the Middle East fails to attract Anarchists
Shakespearian play interrupts pointless phone call
Average length of UK dog lead ‘now 50 yards’ reveals Kennel Club
India to erect statues of George Osborne
Mercury Music prize for Dublin Council as Garth Brooks concerts cancelled
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