The Government has announced today a deal for 350 million pounds a week with the popular and effective tummy tablet to win the advertising and television rights for Brexit. A government spokesperson said the deal had been under discussion for a while but, [read...]
Theresa May has promised voters that an X Factor style TV show could in future determine who presses the nuclear button on behalf of the UK should the need arise. May said contestants would be chosen from a wide range of pre-determined demographics and troubled backgrounds. [read...]
Home Secretary Amber Rudd said there was no real evidence to support Jeremy Corbyn’s crackpot theory that continually bombing innocent people for no good reason eventually pisses them off and can lead to radicalisation. ‘If people in the Middle East see their loved ones blown to pieces by UK war planes then they should not take it personally and seek some sort of ill judged revenge, [read...]
Critics of the Conservative’s plan to scrap school dinners have raised concerns that hungry children are unlikely to give a flying fidget about the mathematical value of x; the photosynthesis of oxbow lakes during the Norman Conquest; [read...]
As the election campaign approaches the last two weeks of canvassing, the Prime Minister’s spin doctors have persuaded Mrs May that she needs to ‘drop her neckline – and her knickers’ to appeal to the critical swathe of voters currently not convinced. [read...]
