Bowing to environmental pressure and an increased demand for saturated fat, McDonalds will be allowing customers to inject, snort or smoke their ‘offal of choice’. There are various options, with some plastic straws being replaced by a more pragmatic mechanism for fast food delivery, [read...]
Your dad has only swanned up to the counter at McDonalds and asked if they ‘do a pot of tea?’, it has emerged. 69 year old Your Dad made the bizarre request on the way back from Tenerife after a 40 minute exercise to try and remember everyone’s orders – [read...]
The conciliation service ACAS, called in to arbitrate between McDonald’s and its striking employees, has issued a statement saying ‘Well, duh. You didn’t realise working there would be shit? You’re serving slabs of gristle, sinew, [read...]
Rise in ginger hair dye anticipated [read...]
McDonalds has announced the closure of all 46 million of its food-serving ‘storefronts’ to focus on offering ‘degrading bathroom experience’s instead. While the sales of ankle-burgers and Chicken-McWaste nuggets have seen a steady decline for the past 19 years, [read...]
