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Posts Tagged ‘Met Office’

Ongoing conflict between North and South Utsire could end Shipping Forecast

In an effort to secure the long-term future of the Shipping Forecast, the Met Office, the Maritime and Coastguard Agency and BBC Radio 4 today urged the UN to intervene in the long-running dispute between North and South Utsire.

Although the two rival sea areas have never formally called a halt to the hostilities – which saw Utsire split at the end of the Cod War in 1976 – an uneasy ceasefire has been maintained for the past three decades, policed by a coalition force made up of troops from neighbouring Viking, Forties and Fisher.

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Posted: Nov 27th, 2015
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‘Sh@t’ still fails to make the list of new storms

While the British public in their infinite wisdom have selected inspirational weather monikers such as Nigel and Steve, more appropriate storm names are going unrequited. Unimaginative responses to the Met Office appeal have meant that no whirlwinds are named after romance, no blasts are called after the past and not a single ‘bloviating windbags’ is named after Michael Gove.

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Posted: Oct 21st, 2015
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Listeners baffled as Met office predict misty ‘but not murky’ weather

In an awkward farewell to their tenure with the BBC, the Meteorological Office caused consternation today when they predicted that Tuesday morning’s weather would only be ‘misty’. Radio listeners who hadn’t mentally turned off as soon as the forecast started were left confused when the usual ‘and murky’ was omitted from the forecast.

‘Just what is happening with our weather?’ demanded Radio 2 listener Colin Pope, 62. ‘It can’t be just misty. It has to be misty and murky…’

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Posted: Sep 13th, 2015
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Met Office warns conditions right for perfect ‘Death of Laddism’ articles storm

The closure of a lad mag and the demise of a car programme could cause the conditions for a perfect media storm, warn the Met Office.

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Posted: Mar 30th, 2015
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Met Office warns of a warm Christmas

chestnuts to be roasted in the sunshine on the patio‘It’s probable that some areas are going to experience double digit temperatures over Christmas,’ conceded a Met Office official today. ‘We think it could be due to a warm southerly front or the new supercomputer overheating, but there is a real risk of a warm Christmas, with grey skies and light drizzle. You know, like the last 45 Christmases everywhere outside the Scottish Highlands, only a bit warmer still.’

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Posted: Dec 19th, 2014
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