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Posts Tagged ‘Microsoft’

Campaign to save Windows 9 gains traction

Protesters from all over the globe are converging on Microsoft offices, computer repair shops and internet cafes to state the case for Windows 9. ‘It’s a pro-life issue,’ said one protester. ‘It may be malformed, prone to crashing, buggy and utterly useless,’ said another, ‘but look at the gene pool,’ he added. ‘I’ll have a gap on my shelf,’ said a middle-aged man sporting an anorak.

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Posted: Oct 3rd, 2014
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PowerPoint demonstration delights sceptical meeting

‘Difficult messages eased by beautiful use of a diagonal slow screen wipe from top-right to bottom left.’

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Posted: Mar 28th, 2014
More from From The Archives



NSA used ‘Microsoft Windows’ to infect millions of computers

The documents leaked by Edward Snowden have yielded what may be their most shocking revelation yet: plans to infect millions of computers with malware to prevent them from working properly. This was devised by the NSA in consultation with a shady billionaire, unofficially named as ‘Bill Gates’, who had close links to many different arms of the US government.

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Posted: Mar 15th, 2014
More from Science/Technology



Man who ‘reported an error to Microsoft’ in 1997 finally receives solution

Thomas Green, a delivery driver from Yeovil has finally rid himself of a ‘sixteen year ordeal’ today after an ‘error report’ he sent to Microsoft in 1997 finally returned a solution.

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Posted: Oct 15th, 2013
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Microsoft buys Betamax

Microsoft has bought Betamax, hoping to steal a march on more successful rivals such as Apple and Samsung. Having dismissed the internet as ‘a passing fad’, and countered the threat of tablet computers by putting wheels on a PC, Steve Ballmer, Microsoft’s CEO, is keen to get the company back on track.

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Posted: Sep 4th, 2013
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