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Posts Tagged ‘Middle East’

Train for jihad in Wales, says tourist board

‘Low-cost flights to the Middle East are hurting our tourism economy,’ said a spokesman. ‘Jihadis are buying last-minute flights to Turkey to complete their training abroad.’

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Posted: Apr 8th, 2015
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Blair named as Middle-England Peace Envoy in ongoing Clarkson row

determined to take the 'larks' out of ClarksonThe government confirmed today that Tony Blair is to take on the weighty responsibility as mediator in the Clarkson Crisis before the UK descends into all-out civil war.

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Posted: Mar 29th, 2015
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Jeremy Kyle sent to broker Middle East peace deal

‘Perhaps Israel can have Gaza during the week and Palestine at weekends?’ suggested Kyle optimistically.

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Posted: Jan 4th, 2015
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Torturers and torture victims to be tortured until they tell truth about torture

truth will out, with a bit of help...After revelations that the CIA used ‘enhanced interrogation techniques’ to torture prisoners, it has emerged that British forces may have to be tortured to see if they admit to having taken part in similar practices after 9/11 and during recent Middle East wars. The army believes that, unpalatable though it is, this may be the only way to the truth.

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Posted: Dec 15th, 2014
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Dropping box-sets of ‘Fame’ on jihadists ‘last desperate throw of dice’ admits US

fame costs... and here's where you start payingThe Pentagon has revealed that US military planes have dropped box-sets of 80′s TV series ‘Fame’ in areas of Iraq currently controlled by Islamic militants. The move is seen as a daring attempt to soften the jihadist’s hard-line approach and move the fighting away from fundamentalist savagery to a more danced-based conflict.

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Posted: Sep 3rd, 2014
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