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Posts Tagged ‘Ministry of Defence’

Ministry of Defence ‘mislays’ small war

Following an auditor’s report that the Ministry of Defence lost track of assets worth £6.3bn, embarrassed officials confirmed last night that the department had also managed to mislay a small war it was conducting.

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Posted: Jul 6th, 2011
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MoD to issue combat soldiers with armour made from grandfather’s pocket watches

The Ministry of Defence has swooped on antique shops across Britain after discovering that most Great War survivors had been saved by a future heirloom in their pocket, usually a fob watch or cigarette case, deflecting a Jerry bullet.

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Posted: Apr 5th, 2011
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Army apologises for sacking soldiers via Moonpig

MoD forced to apologise - also via MoonpigThe Army has apologised after 38 soldiers learned they were losing their jobs after receiving a personalised e-card from Moonpig.com. Worse still, an attempt at humour saw a number of sacked soldiers receive cards showing someone waving two fingers at them.

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Posted: Feb 15th, 2011
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Stealth bribe technology lands Britain Eurofighter deal with India

bid included flock wallpaperSuperior home-grown stealth technology has made the necessary bribes undetectable to conventional systems.

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Posted: Nov 9th, 2010
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Grand Old Duke of York ‘livid’ at army cuts

The Grand Old Duke of York reacted with fury last night as it was announced that his fighting force of 10,000 men may be drastically cut back. ‘A cut of 25% could destroy morale – 7,500 men marching around just looks silly,’ he said.

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Posted: Oct 20th, 2010
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