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Posts Tagged ‘Ministry of Defence’

‘UK troops could lose vital cannon-fodder role,’ warns ex-US defence secretary

Following the shock Twitter announcement in December that the ‘King of Teen-Pop’ would be ‘officially retiring’, Justin Bieber’s management team have made no effort to deny the political aspirations of their boy-genius.

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Posted: Jan 24th, 2014
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Troops withdrawn from Afghanistan after failing health and safety workplace assessment

‘If we’d known that soldiers weren’t being provided with the correct style of ergonomic chair or that the temperature in the workplace was so high, we’d have shut the place down in a jiffy.’

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Posted: Dec 10th, 2011
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It’s not unlike ‘Eric and Ernie’, insists Liam Fox

'He brings me sunshine, through his smile'“Often I’ll be reading important defence papers, wot I wrote, and he’ll just sit there quietly smoking his pipe.”

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Posted: Oct 8th, 2011
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Ministry of Defence ‘mislays’ small war

Following an auditor’s report that the Ministry of Defence lost track of assets worth £6.3bn, embarrassed officials confirmed last night that the department had also managed to mislay a small war it was conducting.

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Posted: Jul 6th, 2011
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MoD to issue combat soldiers with armour made from grandfather’s pocket watches

The Ministry of Defence has swooped on antique shops across Britain after discovering that most Great War survivors had been saved by a future heirloom in their pocket, usually a fob watch or cigarette case, deflecting a Jerry bullet.

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Posted: Apr 5th, 2011
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