Intelligent car afraid to leave garage
The car has refused to leave its garage, citing ‘idiots in Citroen Saxos and a mad man in an Audi that tried to hump me from behind’.
Posted: Dec 8th, 2011
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Posts Tagged ‘motorists’
Ministers to consider raising the speed of light
‘The 300-million-metres-per-second speed limit was introduced at the beginning of the universe and is clearly now out of date,’ he said. ‘What we would be doing is bringing a number of neutrinos which routinely flout the limit back on the right side of the laws of relativity.’
Posted: Sep 30th, 2011
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New species of badger discovered with vital organs on the inside
It has been observed walking around instead of just lying at the side of the road bleeding while being eaten by birds, and is also around a foot higher.
Posted: Sep 15th, 2011
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BMW recalls drivers after safety scare
The luxury car maker said that problems include tail-gating, finger flicking, inability to manage indicators, getting stuck in the overtaking lane, and spontaneous explosions of anger apparently ignited by attempts by other car models to overtake.
Posted: Jun 23rd, 2011
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Highways Agency warns of clear stretch on M3
Drivers have been advised to consider taking alternative routes in order to encounter delays.
Posted: Sep 12th, 2009
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