NewsBiscuit

The news written by you…

Posts Tagged ‘MPs expenses’

Telegraph withdraws expense claim allegations ‘after doing the figures again’

all down to student on work experienceThe Daily Telegraph has issued a front-page apology over the expenses allegations after discovering that its political staff ‘hadn’t read the second column correctly.’

‘In recent weeks, we may have given the impression that the House of Commons is stuffed to the rafters with filthy, rapacious grubbers sponging off the taxpayer to feed their indolent lives of immoral luxury,’ the newspaper’s editorial declares. ‘In fact, it turns out that the whole story was written up by a spotty 17-year-old intern who couldn’t read the figures properly and left out the middle column of numbers. Our MPs are in fact the same fine group of distinguished gentlemen and ladies that they have always been. We hope the mistake hasn’t caused any inconvenience.’

Read more >

Posted: Jun 7th, 2009
More from Politics



Bono attacks pious MPs who don’t pay their taxes

Global campaigner Bono has slammed British M.P.s for avoiding paying tax on their expenses. ‘It’s the piousness I can’t stand,’ said the U2 star yesterday, posing for pictures outside the Houses of Parliament. ‘What’s really nauseating is they act like they’re saving the world, when all they’re doing is saving their receipts.’

Read more >

Posted: May 27th, 2009
More from News In Brief



Anger at Brian the Snail second home claims

Residents of The Magic Roundabout were said to be ‘up in arms’ last night over claims that Brian the Snail has been claiming expenses for a second home. It appears that as well as his one bedroom attached house Mr Snail also has a six bedroom tortoise shell in a desirable location close to Chigley for which he has been claiming the second home allowance.

Read more >

Posted: May 25th, 2009
More from News In Brief



Ronnie Biggs to repay proceeds of Great Train Robbery after ‘genuine oversight’

I just jumped on the train, like everyone elseNotorious Great Train Robber, Ronnie Biggs, has announced that he is to return the proceeds gained from the 1963 multi-million pound train heist in an attempt to restore public confidence in the once honourable criminal classes. Biggs, currently serving a sentence in Norwich prison after returning to the UK in 2001, has described the manner by which he came into the money as ‘an honest mistake’, and has called for a change in the rules which are making morally-upright criminals look like money-grabbing cheats.

Read more >

Posted: May 19th, 2009
More from Politics, UK News



‘Waiting for Gordo’ is West End smash

any time soonThe drama depicts two down-at-heel political parties who spend the whole play waiting for the mysterious ‘Gordo’ to resign.

Read more >

Posted: May 16th, 2009
More from Politics