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Posts Tagged ‘New Zealand’

Man living under a rock ‘bloody tired’ of Royal updates

A man living under a large rock in the middle of the Sahara desert with his eyes shut and fingers lodged in his ears has bemoaned the insufferable level of coverage about the Royal Family he has been exposed to.

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Posted: Apr 16th, 2014
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New Zealand considers putting ‘something Hobbity’ on its flag

As a referendum approaches, New Zealanders are considering removing the Union Jack from their flag and replacing it with ‘something involving a Hobbit’. The current frontrunner is a depiction of Sir Peter Jackson lounging in a pair of sweatpants

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Posted: Mar 13th, 2014
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Research finds that smoking weed can make you ‘err….. stuff’

A team of researchers in New Zealand have conducted a study into the effects of smoking cannabis at a young age, and concluded that ‘Smoking weed while your brain is still developing can make you, like, err…. Forget. Stuff. And things like that, you know…… Cats?’

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Posted: Aug 29th, 2012
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Rugby World Cup in New Zealand ‘not all made up’

New Zealand has been disappointed by the lack of ticket sales and international visitors for the upcoming Rugby World Cup, chiefly because of the difficulty in persuading people that there actually is a World Cup for rugby and occasionally that there is a New Zealand.

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Posted: Sep 8th, 2011
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New Zealanders appeal unintelligibly for help after urthquike

World governments admitted they were ‘baffled’ last night after the New Zealand government issued a ‘fully incomprehensible’ message about an ‘urthquike’.

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Posted: Sep 9th, 2010
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