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Posts Tagged ‘News of the World’

Abu Qatada to improve public image with ‘I’m A Celebrity’ appearance

looking forward to persuading kangaroo's testicles to follow different ideological route‘Abu is looking forward to eating testicles in the jungle, as long as they’re halal.’

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Posted: Feb 9th, 2012
More from Celebrity

Hate me! Hate me again! Says Nick Clegg, pissing on the Cenotaph

‘Now I can be Britain’s most hated person again’, howled Clegg, brandishing a signed photo of the late Queen Mother and vowing: ‘I’m going to wipe my arse on this.’ Clegg staged the dramatic protest after announcing that he was going to sue for wrongful dismissal from his post as the country’s whipping boy.

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Posted: Jul 26th, 2011
More from News In Brief

Rupert Murdoch ‘has no recollection’ of shaving foam attack

Rupert Murdoch insisted he could not recall being attacked yesterday afternoon by a man in a checked shirt wielding a paper plate loaded with shaving foam. ‘A paper what?’ he asked reporters after leaving the Select Committee room. ‘Don’t know anything about that.’

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Posted: Jul 20th, 2011
More from News In Brief

Rebekah Brooks unresigns

checking voice mails again‘It is totally inconceivable that I could have known anything about my resignation,’ said Ms Brooks. ‘Clearly I cannot be held responsible for any decision to resign because when I made it I was only in charge, and anyway I was probably on holiday at the time.’

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Posted: Jul 15th, 2011
More from Business, UK News

‘Busty Mayoress Pamela Snips Wet Nurses’ Ribbon’ reports Shanklin Argus’s newly-recruited reporter

waking the deadA crowd of bikini-clad nurses cheered as buxom Mayoress Pamela Outhwaite, 43, formally opened the Nurses’ Social Club swimming pool, writes our new community reporter who has just joined the Argus from a top national newspaper.

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Posted: Jul 11th, 2011
More from Isle of Wight News