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Posts Tagged ‘news parody’

European immigrant report ‘tarnished with facts’ say UKIP

The revelation by University College London that European immigrants have contributed £20 billion more in taxes than they have taken in benefits has been criticised by Nigel Farage as ‘blighted by facts,’ adding, ‘just because it proves the opposite to what we’ve been saying ignores the simple fact that British people don’t like Europeans.’

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Posted: Nov 6th, 2014
More from News In Brief



Benedict Cumberbatch to win/star in everything and marry your wife

Benedict Cumberbatch is to run the whole world, after appearing in all television programmes and securing world peace, it has emerged.

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Posted: Nov 6th, 2014
More from News In Brief



Home Office asks for advice on how to fix an inquiry

something slightly skewy found on Marsham StreetWith regret Home Secretary Theresa May has conceded that she has run out of ‘dodgy’ candidates to appoint to chair the Inquiry into Historic Child Abuse. Having lost Baroness Butler-Sloss and now Lord Mayor Fiona Woolf to conflicts of interest, Mrs May has been forced to ask betting syndicates, investment bankers and FIFA on how best ‘to rig’ an inquiry. Fortunately having managed to delay the proceedings for a further three months, it is hoped that those accused will have had ‘…plenty of time to shred any incriminating documents’.

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Posted: Nov 1st, 2014
More from Politics



Awesome Welles ‘not that Awesome’ according to undergrad essay

I really don’t see why we have to study this guy, who, despite his name, couldn’t even spell ‘Awemome’ anyway. And he ended up doing TV commercials for sherry, which is like what my great aunt drinks? And she lives in Frinton?’

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Posted: Nov 1st, 2014
More from News In Brief



Tim Cook: Proud to be gay, not proud of iTunes

'discrimination against Windows is wrong!'Apple’s CEO has given his support to alternate sexualities but refused to endorse any music player that refuses to sync with other devices. A spokesman for the global corporation admitted: ‘We need to be tolerant of all MP3 players regardless of brand. As a market leader we need to be more accepting of others – even if Windows Media Player is a crime against nature’.

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Posted: Oct 31st, 2014
More from Science/Technology